Handsome Nathan

This is a picture I found of Nathan on his computer. He was so handsome.

In Memory of Nathan

My brother, only sibling, and best friend passed away on Sunday October 31st, 2010. It was unexpected. He silently and instantly passed from this life to the next into the beautiful arms of the Savior. Autopsy reports are inconclusive so far. My heart desperately aches for my brother. We were more than siblings and more than friends. We were both at the same time which connected us stronger than any other connection two people can have, bar marriage.

Nathan and I shared memories, some good and some bad. He endured my bossy know-it-all years when I harassed him about taking too much soda and driving too fast. He put up with my controlling habits and tolerated my nagging criticisms. I am still not sure how he did it. He used to say "I hope you marry a man that can put up with you!" Even with the way I tried to mother my brother, he loved me and as adults we got along great.

I appreciate Nathan for the way he made me laugh. He lived a life filled with trials and suffering and his humor sustained parts of me when it was unbearable to watch. He and I shared a childhood that is impossible to explain. As adults we laughed often about all the crazy memories of mom and dad. He called me "CM" (short for Catherine MacAllister). He'd call me up on the phone :"Hey CM, guess what dad did. Hey CM, if I have to hear McDougall's name one more time I am going to scream!"

We laughed and cried together for the nine years he lived with me, just before his paralyzing accident. We hugged goodbye and sobbed in each other's arms as he departed for California to attend Project Walk where he spent the last two and half years of his life learning how to take steps again.

The Saturday before he died, it was as if his spirit knew he was about to leave this Earth. He called all his family members, in an amazingly happy mood, to talk and just be together in conversation. The next day he was gone.

Nathan, there won't be a day that passes that I won't miss you. You leave an irreplaceable spot in my heart. I love you and can't wait for the day when I join you in eternity, in the arms of Jesus. Until then, I just remember all the good times we had and the secrets we shared. I am glad you have no more pain. I am comforted at the thought that you are running through Heaven's streets proclaiming the majesty of God. It must be truly awesome!